not where i want to be

i know certain people will enjoy reading this blog.
i'm not happy, not where i want to be.
i feel like i've missed my opportunities to get where i want to be today.
i have no ambitions.
i'm empty and useless.
school is a bust, work sucks so much it makes me sick and hope i would get into a car accident so i don't have to go.
my apartment is the only good thing that i've made for myself.
my care will puke anyday.
i'm ruining something beautiful as always...
seeing something that i could have been a part of fall into place is heartbreaking.
i try so hard but i will never be pretty.
i will never be successful.
i will never be as happy as i used to be.
i miss my family.
i miss laughing.
i miss inspiration.
i'm so bored and life is so dull.
i want to see and travel.
everyone else is doing what i want, living my life.
why can't i take control and make it happen for myelf?
i'm running out...on e.
not sure what is going to happen.
i'm just better off alone.
i want to work at a music store and live in broad ripple.
tryin to keep positive.
ha...failing.